Our Story - Part Too Many to Count

I had therapy this week.

Oh, how I love therapy days.

I usually have notes ready for my appointments with my Erica.

She is just the best at tough love, being to the point, talking to me on my level, and setting goals that are really hard for me.

And then I take these goals and work really hard to meet them, because I'm progressing and I'm worth it!

This week we talked about my story.

MY STORY.

You all have heard me talk about this so many times - that our story is our story and our story to tell.

However, unbeknownst to me, I have not been telling my story to everyone who should hear it!!

That's changing!

I pick and choose who needs to hear MY story.

Subconsciously.

For instance, when members of a family ask me what happened, I direct them to ask their son/brother.

Subconsciously, I am showing their son/brother grace... and in a way I am showing the same to them.

Well, here's the thing:

He didn't earn my grace.

I am holding space for him.

He didn't earn the energy that exhausts from me.

ANNNNDDDD... when I am not telling my story to EVERYone who asks, and in some cases doesn't ask, then I am holding onto it.

Fact: I did nothing wrong in this story.

Fact: He tried to destroy my children and came close...

Fact: NO ONE destroys my children. So, you can do whatever you want to me, but ain't no one going to hurt my kids anymore.

Fact: Mama's gonna tell our story.

More:
I also subconsciously choose who to tell my story to because I don't want to hear people's excuses for their son/brother. 

Well, I get to choose whether or not I allow that.

Excuses start, I say, "Nope. He's an adult. I'm not going to listen to excuses for him. We are done talking about this."

Period.

People can create whatever narrative in their head that they want to in order to protect themselves, their child/brother, their family "integrity..." 

But, they will also hear the real story...

What actually happened.

And they will hear it from me.

Tell your stories, Friends.

They are yours to tell.

Don't hold onto them.

This is a HARD challenge for me because it's not my personality to do this.

I'm much more comfortable with just showing grace and trying to "protect" someone's "honor."

But, again...

It's not my space to hold.