Questions & Answers

This is an important one, in particular for process addiction addicts.

AND for anyone in a relationship of any kind, really.

If you ask someone a question, you need to respect the answer.

Period.

You don't get to ask a question, not like the answer, and go off on the person because YOU didn't like the answer.

Example:

(this is literally a random example, not a personal example)

A tells B that they should attend event 2 instead of event 1 which both take place at the same time.

A & B are married.

B does what A says.

A questions whether or not B felt that A was being controlling.

A is told to ask B how they felt about it...

A isn't sure they want to hear the answer.

If A chooses to ask B if B feels that A is being controlling by telling B which event they WILL be attending, A had better be ready for the answer.

If B tells A that yes, in fact, they did feel bossed around or controlled, A must respect that answer and not be upset with B for their true feelings.

If you ask someone a question, it is then your responsibility to listen.

Listen to their feelings.

Listen to their answer.

Listen to their perception.

Listen to all of it, without response.

Hard.

Yes.

But necessary.