Warrior Mode

Ryan sent me a bunch of pictures last week.

Looking at them brings a lot of feelings and emotions.

Four kids in four years isn't for the faint of heart.

Four kids with health issues REALLY isn't for the faint of heart.

I did it on my own for the most part.

Yes, I had family help. 

For the most part, I was on auto-pilot.

Again, I wasn't feeling feelings or emotions.

I didn't know how.

When my kids were sick or in the hospital, or when I was changing four kids diapers at the same time daily, I was on auto-pilot.

I advocated for them in the best ways I could.

The best ways I knew how.

Kaydon had a hospice nurse, who came in twice a week.

She was a God-send.

She would love on ALL of the boys so I could run to the grocery store, or take a bath or just sit in the bathroom and cry for an hour.

I had amazing visiting teachers/life-long friends, who would help me to escape to Cafe Rio for an hour.

Warrior Mode almost always has a drop-off point. 

I hit mine repeatedly.

And then I REALLY hit it.

Back to doing my best now...