Addiction Recovery - Honor Your Emotions

MyStory:

I had an invisible closet for 42 years.

This closet held ALL of my emotions, feelings, thoughts...

The personal ones that were mine.

I didn't know what the name of emotions were.

I didn't know what the feelings meant, let alone what to do with them.

I knew good and I knew bad.

I didn't want bad, so they went into the closet.

Little did I know that there really are no "bad" emotions.

There are just emotions.

Emotions are not dangerous.

Emotions give us information.

It is our RESPONSIBILITY and OPPORTUNITY to feel them.

Then, we can figure out what we need to do with them or how to let them go.

Before I could move forward, with the knowledge of who I even was, I had to learn to name my emotions, trust that they were okay to feel, learn what information they were giving me, and then determine what to do with them.

That last part there - that requires agency.

The only thing in this mortal life that takes away our agency is addiction.

Addiction is pattern of behaviors that we can no longer manage on our own.

It took A LOT of work to get to the point where I knew who I was, by knowing WHOSE I was.

Once I put that work into constant, consistent practice I was on my way!

I have learned that honoring my emotions, my thoughts, and my feelings is EMPOWERING.

I have had many occasions when I have invited (out loud) those emotions and feelings to come sit at the table with me. 

I've told them that I've saved a seat for them, where they may sit.

Sometimes I inform them that I am not interested in what they have to say, but they are welcome to be there.

When we feel, and not ignore or push away, our emotions and feelings - that is when we have the strongest agency.

Releasing that closet door - 

Taking the door off of its hinges so that I could never shove things in there and close it again - 

That took time.

It took tears.

It took work.

It took a village to support me and help me through it.

But I did it.

You can too.